Artwork by Lauren Anderson
The power of the pen is a phrase commonly used to
suggest the power held in the hands of an author as they write their opinions
or beliefs. Today, the phrase would be better stated, “The power of the
keyboard and social media.” The new phrase would encompass the words of any
Tom, Dick, or Harry. Nowadays everyone voices their opinion and beliefs through
Facebook, Twitter, and blogs, but that doesn’t matter; the statement still
holds true. There is power in the pen (keyboard), and that power has grown
exponentially due to the medium of social media. So, is there some sort of
magic that issues from the ink as it rolls onto the paper? Or is there some
mystical element contained within the keys of a keyboard? No, the power lies
within the tongue and the words that come forth from it.
Proverbs 18:21, “Death and life are in the power
of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” (KJV)
Proverbs teaches us that the tongue holds a
unique power—the power to produce life, as well as death; but not only does it
teach that the tongue possesses such an inimitable power, but we learn that we
choose to consume the fruit we prefer. If we love death and words that produce
death, we will consume the words that stab and cut and devour. If we love life
and words that produce life, we will ingest into our spirit the words that
speak life, love, and happiness. The tongue can be a tool for building
self-esteem and confidence, but just as it can be a tool, it can also be a
weapon of destruction used by bullies.
Back when I was in school, bullies used their
tongues as knives of intimidation and destruction. These attacks happened in
the schoolyard, and there may have been a few phone calls made at the end of
the day, spreading rumors and lies about an individual, but the victims had the
safe haven of home where the bully’s words could not invade their territory.
Today, bullies still use their tongues, but they’ve also learned about another
weapon at their disposal, the power of the pen; so now, not only do they run
their mouths to spread rumors and lies about others, but they use their
fingertips to strike the keys of their keyboards and post their threats on
social media sites. Widening their scope of attack beyond the schoolyard or the
workplace, they now have the ability to invade every aspect of their victim’s
lives.
Trolls is a common word used on the Internet to
describe people who hide behind the fact that they cannot be seen and their
identity is often hidden, yet they viciously attack people online. Some people
use vagueness in their attacks on social media in order to hide from those they
are verbally attacking on the Internet, but the bottom line is, whether it is a
bully or a troll, the use of social media to verbally attack individuals and
spread rumors and lies about them is cyberbullying, and it is punishable by the
law. Not only is it punishable by the laws of our state, but it is also
punishable by God.
Psalm 101:5, “Whoever slanders his neighbor
secretly I will destroy.” (ESV)
According to God, if you slander (the act of
making a false spoken statement, damaging to a person’s reputation) someone in
secret (behind their back), He will destroy you.
Proverbs 10:18 (b), “…whoever utters slander is a
fool.” (ESV)
According to God’s Word, if you utter slander (a
false spoken statement, damaging to a person’s reputation), you are a fool.
So, the question is this, are you still guilty if
you believed a lie and spread it? Yes, not knowing something is false does not
excuse you if you spread it as if it is the truth! Deuteronomy 19:15, “One
witness shall not rise up against a man for any iniquity, or for any sin, in
any sin that he sins; at the mouth of two or three witnesses shall a matter be
established.” (ASV) In other words, you are not excused because you are
required not to believe an accusation against someone based on one witness. It
requires two or three witnesses.
Recently, I fell victim to such an attack.
Someone was told I called their child a name. I did NOT! But rather than
question the source, and rather than coming to me and asking me if I did what I
was accused of, the person responded in anger on social media.
Matthew 18:15-17, “If your brother (or sister)
sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone; if he
hears you, you have gained your brother, but if he does not hear you, then take
one or two brothers with you, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every
word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it to the
church. But if he neglects to hear the church, let him be unto you as a heathen
and a publican.” (ESV)
Not only did the individual lash out against me
on social media, but she made false accusations against my character, claiming
that I did not raise all of my children and claiming that I had not taught my
daughter how to be a lady. Since she did not name me (Psalm 101:5) but
slandered me secretly, I did not realize the post was about me. Had her finger
pointing been based in truth, I may have realized she was naming me, but the
accusations spoken did not pertain to me. Both statements were slanderous lies!
I raised all five of the children I brought into this world. I raised my first
born child by myself for the first two years of her life, and she was only four
months away from nineteen when she moved out of my house, so I do believe that
constitutes raising my children. She also blurted for all to read that my
daughter (someone who is supposed to be her friend) did not know how to be a
girl because I had not taught her how to be a girl. I will not even dignify
that with a rebuttal. Anyone who knows me, knows how I have raised all my
children. Along with being slandered, the lady also made a verbal threat of a
physical attack against me. Her post incited other bullies to join in and make
their own threats of physical harm.
Once I was informed that the post was about me, I
confronted the person I was told this woman said told her I called her child a
heathen or hellion. That person was my daughter, her friend. I calmly asked her
(my daughter) why I was being told she said I called someone a name, something
she knew I had not done. She claimed she did not tell her friend that I said
anything, saying she didn’t know why the woman thought I said such a thing.
This is not the first time I’ve been through
something of this nature. Back in 2010 I had a woman make false accusations
against me on Facebook. I was speaking at a rehab and this individual wanted to
be able to hear me speak. I have five children. I was extremely busy getting
them ready to be babysat while I spoke, and I was running late. The woman messaged
me and mentioned not being able to attend because she didn’t have the gas in
her car. As stated, I was running late myself, and I did not know where she
lived. I was the speaker, so being late wasn’t an option. I told her I was
sorry she would be unable to attend and left my home. She had wanted me to
offer her a ride to where I was speaking. Because I did not do so, she unleashed
a verbal attack on social media. I was devastated! I knew her children and
loved them, so I prayed about how to handle the situation. I felt led by God
not to respond to anything that was said on Facebook. Jesus stood before His
accusers and said nothing in His defense before His crucifixion. I never
doubted how I handled the situation. I knew God had led me to stay silent.
Then a couple of years later an author accused me
of plagiarism on Facebook. She had not read my work, and I had not read her
work either. Plagiarism kind of hinges on stealing another person’s words. You
can’t steal words you haven’t heard or read, and you can’t make a credible
accusation against another author for stealing your words when you haven’t read
the book you claim plagiarized yours. I was once again devastated! This time I
contacted the woman and pointed out that my work had been written several years
prior to ever meeting her and that I could not plagiarize what I had not read.
She removed her post and sent me a letter of apology. I accepted her apology,
but I was bothered that she did not admit her accusation was false through the
same medium that she made the accusation, but I let it go and left it in God’s
hands.
So, once again, I am devastated at the slander of
my character on Facebook, and I was left to pray and ask God how to handle the
situation. This time I have felt led to make a response through the same medium
that I have been slandered through, social media. Sometimes you have to stand
up against the lies with the truth. As an author I know the power of the pen,
and as a believer I know the power of the Word of God. Proverbs 18:21 clearly
says I have the power of life and death at the tip of my tongue, and since
those things at the tip of my tongue have a way of making their way through my
fingertips onto a black keyboard, I had to choose how to handle my words. I
choose to eat the fruit of life. I’m not angry, not anymore. At first I cried
because I felt Satan stab me in the heart with the viciousness of the things
being said about me. People who do not even know me joined in the attack
against me, and my ex-husband jumped on the bandwagon too, claiming to be
curious. I had bitten off and chewed on the fruit of death that was being
delivered on social media about me.
After I stopped crying, I got angry, and then my
husband reminded me I must be doing something right in order for Satan to seek
me out to attack me so strongly, and boy does Satan know where to stab. He goes straight
for the jugular. Once my daughter admitted to me that she knew I was innocent
(the phone call was recorded, by the way), God gave me a peace, and He showed
me how I can help others to gain victory over gossip and slander. By sharing
what I’ve been through, confronting the lies that are being spread, and calling
it what it is—SLANDER, LIES, AND BULLYING, I can help others to learn how to
eat fruit that produces life. Life is gained when you stop the bleeding caused
by rumors and gossip. When you confront the gossip and slander, Satan loses his
weapon.
Be Blessed and Be Made Whole,
Pinky
