These Things Ought Not To Be

The scripture has been coming to mind lately concerning two or three witnesses. While I'm not certain who this may be for, I am positive someone out there needs to hear this.

All too often in our work places, amongst friends, in our families, and, yes, even in churches, talk destroys relationships.

When I was a little girl I was taught the saying, "Never believe anything you hear and only half of what you see because what you hear is called rumors and gossip and what you see might appear to be one thing when it is in fact another. Something can be completely innocent, yet it can appear to be riddled with guilt."

God dealt with this as well in the scripture, and He went so far as to say one witness wasn't enough, so if you've been guilty of going around saying something someone told you they saw with their own eyes, God's question to you would be, "Was it seen by two or three credible witnesses?". The reason for that is eye witness testimony has proven (more often than not) to be false. That is because the human memory is unreliable! Not only is human memory unreliable, but eye witness testimony may place a person in a location and then the witness assumes the reason for the person being in that location. Let me give you a couple of examples...

Two female friends decide to have a girls day out, so they tell their husbands where they are going and who they will be with. They are in a public place together. They spend the day together enjoying themselves. Girl 1 gets a phone call on her cell. It's a private family situation, so she excuses herself and tells her friend she will meet her in the car in ten minutes. Girl 2 gets the ticket for their shared meal, pays for it, and heads to the restroom to give her friend a moment of privacy before heading out to the vehicle. As she exits the restroom, she runs into a male friend. They speak to one another. Being the gentleman he is, he offers to walk her out to her vehicle; after all, he works at the same company as her husband. He knows him as well.  As they walk across the parking lot, she runs into another female she knows entering the restaurant. She stops and hugs her and says hi. She doesn't think twice about the fact she was being walked to her car. Six months later, she discovers that the female friend she ran into has told people she saw her "with" another man!

An eye "witness" saw her with another man and assumed it was something scandalous, and by telling others she saw it, she destroyed relationships.

Another example: A single woman walks into a department store to shop. As she's leaving with bags in tow, a married man she knows opens the door for her and walks out with her. She looks up at him, shocked by his presence because she was engrossed in gathering all the bags she had and trying to find her keys in her purse as she walked towards the door. She smiles, and they converse as he walks her to her car as any gentleman would do. Yet his gentlemanly act is assaulted when someone who knows him sees him from a distance and runs to his wife, telling her that she has just seen her husband out "with" another woman!

An eye "witness" saw the man with another woman and assumed he was doing something inappropriate and by telling his wife, she caused marital problems where there were none. 

This is why God doesn't take it lightly when people go around spreading gossip and rumors. 

Proverbs 6:16-19King James Version (KJV)

¹⁶ These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:
¹⁷ A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
¹⁸ An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,
¹⁹ A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.

So, what we see here is that the first six listed, God hates, but the seventh one is an abomination to Him. That's pretty strong. 

My question then is what is a false witness? According to scripture a false witness is someone who spreads a false report. Maybe they were the only person who saw something, and they "assumed" what they were seeing. They ARE a false witness. Maybe they were TOLD something by someone else, and they are going around telling others they believe it. They ARE a false witness. When someone tells you something about someone else, and they add that so and so saw it with their own eyes, if they do not give you two or three credible names who saw the same exact situation, they are spreading LIES according to the Word of God, and those who spread gossip and rumors of a false witness are in fact sowing discord, and that is something God calls an abomination!

James 1:26
If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man's religion is worthless. 

James 3:3-10

Now if we put the bits into the horses' mouths so that they will obey us, we direct their entire body as well. Look at the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are still directed by a very small rudder wherever the inclination of the pilot desires. So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire!  And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell. For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race. But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way.

Maybe you are out there reading this and you've heard someone say they saw something, before you go around telling even one soul, think about these scriptures. Did two or three credible witnesses tell you the same story? If not, it does not stand before God. Does James consider your religion worthless? If you are telling things you "think" to be true but you do not have two or three witnesses to cause it to be established as a truth according to scripture, James says your religion is worthless, and you have deceived yourself.

The tongue is a deadly poison. Think about the relationships you could be destroying when you open your mouth and loosen your tongue. Think about the spiritual death you may be bringing about. Think about the evil you are guilty of when you do not bridle the tongue. Choose to speak life. Choose to speak up when someone tells you they saw someone doing something wrong and interject life. Remind them it may not be what it seems, and remind them it is not wise for them to spread something that they do not know to be a fact. Choose to speak out that you will NOT believe something that is being spread unless it lines up with the standard the Word of God sets. Choose to rise above. Choose to tame the tongue. Let the gossip stop with you. 

Be blessed and be made whole,

Pinky

The Gift of Wholeness

The bitter sting of pain has brought tears to my smiling eyes and a dull ache to my blissful heart as of late. That sentence seems conflicting, doesn't it? It makes no sense. It's illogical, and I'm a logical woman. I need to be able to understand things, not only through faith but through reason as well. The ability for my heart to feel both emotions at the same moment over the same situation prompted me to dwell on how and why. How can we feel two opposite emotions all at the same time? How can we experience complete and total joy while being stabbed in the heart with the dull knife of pain? As I took a moment to "selah" over that thought and talk to God about it, I came to the knowledge and belief that we are able to do both at the same time through the amazing gift of being made whole!

Just a year ago I would not have felt utter joy while my heart ached as it has this holiday season. A year ago I was a broken woman, a woman who had a wounded and bleeding heart that had never healed. I had come to God and given Him my life. He had moved in my life and set me free from many things, but I had endured stab after stab after stab through the years that had injured me and left my wounds freely bleeding. I was imprisoned by my wounds, and my circumstances kept the wounds from healing. As I bleed out all of the life and vitality of my spirit and soul, I slowly died. People around me saw a living being with a smile planted upon her face, a smile that covered and hid the pain lurking beneath the surface. The truth is I was lifeless. I wore a mask for others to see, but God knew the truth. God was the one I cried out to when no one else was around. He was the one for whom I took off my mask.

During those years of hidden pain, any and all jabs and punches thrown my way sent me whirling into a depression. I fought back with the spiritual strength I had, but when your spirit is bleeding, that strength does not last. Not being whole prevents even the strongest person from having the stamina to fight back, and in our weakness we are overcome by negative influences and moods. I did not have the ability to process the pain because I was not whole. I was covered with lacerations. My spirit and soul were not healthy as a result. I prayed for many years for God to bring complete deliverance in my life. This thing of being made whole doesn't come in an instant. It takes time. God does not always answer your prayers instantaneously. He brings things to pass in His perfect timing. I needed my circumstances to change in order for my wounds to begin healing. In my case my circumstances kept me in a perpetual state of injury.

Once the journey of changed circumstances began, I needed to no longer be half of the person I was made to be. I needed the one I was made to complete---the one made to complete me. Some of you reading this may feel it odd that a woman in 2016 would say such a thing, but I believe the word of God to be true. I believe He made woman for man and that it is not good for man to be alone. I believe God creates us with a particular person in mind. He forms us to complete that person, and they in turn complete us. Two become one. I am a woman with a mind of her own, but I needed my beloved, my forever, and he needed me.

I've learned a lot over the last year of my life as I ventured towards completeness. I've learned that pain overcomes a heart that is not whole; it consumes the broken heart. Once you've allowed God to complete the healing in your life, pain no longer has the same affect on the heart or mind. Being whole doesn't change the fact that we live in a world with good and bad; it just means the pain associated with the bad doesn't take away any of the joy we have. I have experienced that for the first time in my life this holiday season.

My family dynamic has completely changed. I stood in my new living room with my new husband watching my daughter and my young stepson decorate the Christmas tree together. It was a new tradition being created. I've always decorated the tree while my children were at school, but this year our two youngest hung the ornaments. Christmas music surrounded us all, flooding the atmosphere with the spirit of the season. I felt such happiness in that moment, yet a tear spilled over onto my cheek as I missed my other children. They are growing up and making their own way in life now. They have girlfriends and a boyfriend and best friends and jobs and school, and they are starting to fly out of their nest. It's a natural process to release them into life and adulthood, but the changes in my new life have made it sting a little more.

Last year during this season, sadness consumed me. I sat and watched my children open their gifts in their own environment, and I felt momentary cheerfulness in their joy, but the ache in my heart overwhelmed even the happiness, causing it to be a glimpse of laughter snatched away in an instant. I could not overpower the misery because my heart was a shattered glass scattered over years of heartbreak. This year, I feel sorrow, but a strong heart made whole through God and His wonderful gift to me is able to smile with a tear in my eye.

I always end my blog with "Be blessed and be made whole." I understand now why God placed that particular saying on my heart. I was on my own journey to wholeness, and I want others to experience the same. Never give up! It took years for God to heal my heart. It was worth the wait.

Be blessed and be made whole,

Pinky